Personal Full-Moon Check-In


Flower Moon 2-18: May full moon in the skyThis post actually has nothing to do with the moon that reached its max today. I basically put “full moon” in the title to place this post in time. A tad.

I’ve been wanting to share a few random tidbits. Lately I find myself receiving more personal contact from people with questions about my take on events (or lack thereof), or seeking more info about me personally. This flurry has had me typing a lot more than I have in a while, and I tend to peter out after transmitting a few hundred words in any direction. Maybe sharing a few things on the blog will give interested parties a sense of my journey at this juncture.

Like so many, I seem to be in a shift. This has been going on for years (much of which has been more like stuck gears than shifting ones) but lately I seem to be coming into a new phase. Not sure where it’s going; just sharing the free-form ride of the moment with you here!

Re-Memberance of Me

For one thing, curious to me has been that more of my personal history has been coming up for remembrance and review. For a long time, post-kundalini, my trails have been largely shrouded from my consciousness: dismembered from my awareness. I’m talking about childhood, family-of-origin, young adult episodes, relationships, and the like.

Recently some of these have been emerging from deep pockets of time, waving & wiggling & saying HI, remember us? I interpret this as a wave of integration whose time has come after a very long dormancy. I thought my past was literally gone with the wind!


[small sidebar]  Funny, as I write this, what popped to mind is the new Christopher Robin live-action film coming to theaters this summer, in which CR is a burdened adult who reconnects with his childhood friends.

The Pooh books comprised some of my happiest childhood memories – specifically, precious time with my mom who read me the stories giving each character its own voice. The way she “embodied” Piglet used to make me laugh til tears flowed. I didn’t actually have a lot of 1:1 time with my mother, so the times we did share are precious to me to remember now. {{Thank you Mom… so much love in these memories!}}

“What should happen if you forget about me?” asked Pooh.

Aw, now I’m feeling a little emotional. *sniff*


*

Recently I’ve been more aware of the magic inherent in Life: The Act of Being Alive and sharing Aliveness with Other Alive Ones. The fact that Life is bursting forth in the long, warm, and lately very wet days of the season is surely an influence.

I’m speaking primarily now of luminous animal and plant beings.

Plant Beings

https://i0.wp.com/www.ethicsdaily.com/files/image/earth-hand1523013932.jpg

After years of very mediocre results trying to grow a few veggies from seeds in a nice raised-bed planter that a friend had generously built for me, this year I’m thrilled to have that planter filled with fluffy kale, spinach, and chard greens, and one proud cherry tomato plant. I bit the bullet and planted starters this time. These plants are (I swear) glowing with life, and thriving in each others’ company in a home protected from grazing deer.

I surround the planter regularly with a sphere of light, and have been out there in downpours and hailstorms, covering my “babies” carefully with a tarp. A few times each day I come by and praise them, telepathically telling them how beautiful they are, thanking them for the life they give of themselves for my nourishment, etc. I ask for each plant’s permission before taking a few leaves, and thank them for each leaf I pluck.

(I remember reading once of a woman’s experience with daisies, where she emanated such joy and appreciation of the flowers that she noticed one smile back at her. Life is so much richer when you’re open to – and receiving of – its magic! All of which will become more noticeable as we move into higher frequencies and remain appreciative and watchful.)

This past week has been sopping with rain so I’ve not needed to water the veggies, but when I do I feel I perceive much joy as these plant-beings sigh with pleasure at the sensation of receiving cool water on their leaves and in their soil on hot days. This simple foray into caring for a “family” of veggies has been a delightful gift that goes both ways.

The Tree Being

Fantasy - Magic Magical Tree Wallpaper Speaking of plants, I recently had a “moment” with my favorite tree out front. This tree graces the front yard closest to the house and my front windows. It took a brutal hit last year from a clueless broadband installer who, while I was away, carved violently thru the lawn with machinery in a way that chopped way into this tree’s huge roots on one side.

He hacked right up next to the tree during his in-ground cable installation. I was devastated when I discovered the scene! Huge, thick, life-giving roots were strewn about the yard in a murderous mess. I’m serious when I tell you, I grieved this perfectly mindless attack on this lovely, innocent tree.

I went out there and loved that tree with all I could give it. I apologized for the installer’s unconsciousness re: what he’d done. I worked with the tree to build up its toroidal field as protection and energetic shelter & sustenance for (I prayed) its recovery from this shocking occurrence. Soon it began dropping a lot of branches from that side. Large arms just “let go” at the point where they’d grown from the trunk. Some detached branches are still stuck up high among other branches, preventing them from falling. I’d like to get up there to remove them before they weigh others into breaking.

A few evenings ago, at dusk, I was out there with Tree (deserving of capitalization ;), admiring it and loving it and enjoying watching all the birds hopping among its branches, singing their good-nights to the ending day. I was totally one with this scene. And, in “magical” acknowledgment – at just about heart-level, below where the main trunk splits into two on its majestic reach upward – the tree emitted a fantastic flash of Light at me. Truly, my heart burst open at the phenom of this. I know this tree has felt my loving attention in these months since its harsh wounding, and the other night Tree viscerally reciprocated.

Trees are exceptional Beings. I know many of you know this. :) You might find one of my favorite Rumi poems nourishing.

(By the way, for some reason my photos of these things will NOT transfer here to WordPress. No idea why; they would’ve been nice to include here. I’m substituting personal pics with ones found online. Having lots of tech troubles lately.)

Animal Love & Care

I love animals, and, as you may know, share my home with three rescued cats and a fourth “wild child,” Ravi, who spends a lot of time with us. I shared his spunky story here and here.

I’ve been brushing huge amounts of winter undercoat from these cats lately, as well as removing ticks – especially from Ravi, who spends a lot of his time lolling under bushes and cars. He is so incredibly trusting of me, he just rolls over so I can “work on” him all over, including belly, legs, and tail, while he purrs.

I’m not a fan of the flea/tick application stuff you put on the backs of their necks, but at one point I did apply it to see if it helped. I don’t want to make a routine of it tho; it’s like the veterinary version of too many vaccines in my opinion. It taxes their immune system and filtering organs, often, over time, causing premature death (again, my opinion, based on research).

My eldest girl, now 7, had developed a bad case of irritable bowel syndrome by the time she was 5. This was very concerning because IBS was what ultimately led to the untimely death of another beloved cat. Vet care was NOT working. But I seem to have stumbled onto something that DOES help: brewer’s yeast. And also, which basically goes without saying: better pet food. The cheap stuff is made of things that, really, no cat/dog should be eating. Chewy.com is my typical go-to for cat food.

Also advisable to keep on hand for especially bad bouts of IBS is >>> FloraCare G.I. paste. You can buy this natural remedy online. FYI. It’s the best thing I’ve found for runaway runs.

Anyway: much healthier food for the felines PLUS the “special ingredient” of brewer’s yeast powder in wet food, which they LIKE, has been helping not only with IBS, but ALSO with parasites! Fleas and ticks apparently are NOT attracted to blood “seasoned” with brewer’s yeast. The difference is remarkable, all around. I’m also now putting B.Y. in all my smoothies, in attempt to deter little biters and stingers from liking me so much! It’s got a pleasant, subtle flavor that’s easy to work into most anything. win/win/win

People & Clearings

Back to my recently energized theme of truth, integrity, etc… I’ve had a couple of what I call clearings with people I know. One was with a person who tends to go on about a lot of drama that she really seems to generate herself. I suspect she is literally addicted to drama, which is (I’m being generous) about 95% negative, and occupies about the same ratio of her conversations. Moreover, she typically pulls me into her stories as though we are “the same” in a certain way.

One day I got really clear – with myself first, and then with her – about this habit of hers of pulling my life into her narrative. I explained that I did not feel as she did about this particular issue, and please stop dragging me in as though we are a “club of commiserators.” She accepted my gentle delivery of my feelings, which I shared with clarity, conciseness, and levelness. It was a good clearing. Time will tell if she remembers/respects my position!

 

Then a few days ago I heard from an old boyfriend. Our stormy relationship was half a lifetime ago, and it was an ongoing exercise in frustration for me. He was (is) a “larger than life” personality (ego) who routinely diminished my interests, priorities, and world view. We were together for about 18 months, at which point I moved to Colorado. We continued long-distance for about another year but all that was *me* was consistently over-ridden in favor of his more important, larger, semi-famous life.

(I’ve since come to see a pattern of mine, being, testing my power with powerful men. An astrologer once told me this Alpha Male theme is somehow in my natal chart… something about my North Node maybe? I’m not astrologically learned enough to take it further. But combining this with challenged self esteem has brought me a world of hurt and anguish. Think I’m over that “lesson” now. :))

Back to this man. He was/is older, and is now in the process of organizing hundreds if not thousands of photos of his Large Life for his websites and (we’ll see if it manifests) book. Every once in a while he sends me a photo I’m in that he comes across as he does this. So the other day he sent me a pic taken during a day trip we made to the country ages ago.

We had a little to/fro about the date of this trip, for his documentation purposes. The more I looked at the photo, the more I recalled about that day, and it was not pretty. He did something unconscionable . . . something really hurtful to me that day. Which brought to mind other nasty experiences with him – one that was witnessed by my parents.

I ended up telling him what came up for me re: the photo, and his outrageously chauvinist and demeaning behavior. I was very even, not emotional. I thanked him for making it easier for me to tune in to and follow my heart to a life more suitable for me: quieter, closer to nature, in the mountains, spiritually oriented. In other words: I had my clearing re: a very old issue. It went well. Boundaries, even those retro-erected or acknowledged decades later, are healing.

Might there be any “clearings” that could use active attention in your life?

Whew. Long post! Thanks for sticking with me to the end. So much love to you!

Onward ho.

Image result for getting clear on what you want

 

 

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